How to Handle Sexual Harassment at work place

Palms sweating, heart thundering, Jane stepped out of the elevator and walked the short distance to her office.

Opening the large shiny metallic door, she dropped her handbag, at the same time taking a surreptitious glance at the adjoining door. The closed blinds answered her question and she released a breath she never knew she was holding; her boss was not yet in.

To keep her jagged nerves from exploding as she waited for his eminent arrival, she busied herself with arranging files that obviously needed no arrangement.

She had gotten this job a little over two months ago after 3 years of surviving with her four year old daughter on just unemployment benefits.

How she had landed it was nothing shy of a miracle considering that her highest academic qualification was her high school certificate.

If she ever doubted how lucky she was to own this job, her friends and family had done well to remind her.

However, what had seemed to be the biggest breakthrough of her young life had suddenly turned into her worst nightmare.

It began with a few lewd comments from her boss, which soon graduated to intermittent rough pats on her butt. Just 2 weeks ago, he had cornered her and given her a rough kiss when she went in to give him his morning coffee.

Don’t be so quick to judge her, she knew she deserved better.

But she was no longer living for herself alone; she had a four year old to think about. Giving up this job will trigger up a life she was not willing to go back to. This job had workers to pay, and she had bills to pay.

If only things could have different.

The squeaking sound behind her was all she needed to hear and know that he had arrived. Giving him a greeting as she avoided his sly grin, she settled back into her seat as she waited patiently for when the torturous day will end.

Photos by Stefano Pollio On Unsplash

Amazingly, the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) reports receiving 12,000 allegations of sexual harassment every year, with women accounting for about 83 % of the complaints.

This figure however, has been said to be just a tiny piece from the whole puzzle.

The Atlantic Training also estimated that one in three women between 18 and 34 have been a victim of sexual harassment in work place.

The implication of the above is that one out of three of your colleagues at work (you included maybe) has probably faced sexual harassment.

Thank God for the recent outcry of people like Alyssa Milano, Gabrielle Union, Lucy Hale, etc, who have opposed through the media and other platforms the act of sexual harassment by employers of labor against their workers.

Despite this, the crime of sexual harassment like the increasing influx of immigrants in America have not stopped or reduced.

I too have my own scar.

I once worked for a dude who was always in the habit of calling me into his office and telling me tales about his sex life in very gruesome details. He would ask me questions like `when was the last time you had sex?’

I had the brains the walk out before he practiced his strange sexual predilections on me, but that my friend does not make it less of an assault.

The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) stated that sexual harassment included unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, inappropriate touching, invasion of privacy, sexual jokes, lewd or obscene comments or gestures, unwelcome sexual emails, text messages or phone calls and other verbal or physical harassment of a sexual nature in the workplace.
It’s no doubt or news that many who go through this want out.

But the question is: why do they in most case still remain and fail report the obvious and glaring assault meted out to them by their employees.

The reasons are not farfetched;

1. Fear of the Consequences:
   Depending on the impishness of their employee, victims of sexual assault have failed to report their ordeal and chosen rather to continue with their jobs, as doing otherwise came with a lot of baggage, which ranged from the possibility of losing their job, losing a promotion or losing their credibility in their profession.
2. Shame:
   Shame is the natural reaction to being violated or abused. It is one of the primary reasons why men and women who have been abused have refused to come forward.
3. Low Self-Esteem:
   When a man or woman thinks so little of himself, he will find himself or herself explaining away even a gruesome assault on her person.
4. Ignorance:
   Some unfortunately, do not even know what constitutes a sexual abuse. For them, only when rape or other inhumane sexual act is meted out on them at the work place do they believe that sexual harassment has been done to them.
5. History of Sexual Abuse:
   When a lady or even a man suffers sexual abuse for a long time, it gets to point that further acts of abuse gets unconsciously swept under the rug.

Realistically speaking, walking out on a job where one or more of the above is the case can be the hardest thing ever.

In walking out of my earlier mentioned job, I had to battle the fear of the consequences of quitting. What if my boss goes ahead and spread lies about me to our other colleagues? What if I don’t get as soon as possible another well paid job like the one I was about to quit?

However, inspire of all these fears and questions, I knew that I would rather have the answer to those questions in the negative, than allow any man abuse me just because I was unfortunate enough to work for him.

Here are a few things to do:

1. Avoid laughing at or encouraging inappropriate jokes.
2. Tell the perpetrator that you do not like his advances, whatever they might be.
3. Tell a friend about it.
4. You can to the superior of the perpetrator, informing him/her of the actions of his junior.
5. You can also make a complaint to the governing body against sexual harassment at work place in your state.
6. Finally, you can get an employment lawyer.

Always remember that you deserve much more than a boss or co-worker who doesn’t know when and how to keep his hands or mouth to himself.